The End

The End

(this news item posted on June.17.2006)

Welcome to the end. The end of chapter 3 that is. I'm writing a second autobiography. Really slowly. And today I find myself at the end of chapter 3.

How does chapter 3 end?

Well the guy gets the gal. And the other gal. But not without a climactic finale. I thought that my new girlfriend and my old girlfriend and me were just just going to smooth sail into bliss. But that was not to be. Last Tuesday I really messed things up. We all messed things up. We were all communicating super fast (because all three of us are great communicators), but I don't know if it was even possible to communicate as fast as we'd have had to communicate to smooth sail through the complexity involved in the three of our lives. There was a lot of really intense hurt and confusion and shock.

Funny thing is... all of the mess from trying to start this new relationship didn't really hurt the new relationship any... BUT it did end up making the old relationship that much better. Which I wouldn't have imagined was even possible. But somehow... was.

Another interesting plot twist. Heather has my old job at Dunlop. So that means: she gets a chance to see what the job I used to talk to her about is like first hand, I get to help her learn the job with all of the things I picked up, we get to ride to work together a few days a week since I still work in the same physical location, and Heather has an income so her stress about not having an income can begin to disipate. She looks really authoritarian in her uniform, it's an amazing transformation.

Heather's been helping to organize the house finances and prepare to invite people into our Art Co-op too so even my finances are starting to heal ever so slowly.

So the end of chapter three finds me feeling really loved and appreciated. Enthusiastic about future projects. Feeling like community and family are finally beginning to come into my life. life is a fun ride.


So... up next is chapter 4.

Chapter 4 will not only be chapter 4, but it will also be a fully self-contained story in its own right. What I'm trying to say is that my journaling is about to become radically different. It's about to turn into a story called "The Problem With Earthlings..."

It's been bouncing around my mind for some time and I highly recommend it to you. I think that you should add my journal to your favorites in your browser or subscribe to my blog on MySpace(which is a pretty cool feature by the way) or add me to your livejournal friends or do whatever is involved in helping you to follow along. It'll be fun. Or interesting. Or some other nice adjective.

See ya there.

-Alex

3am

3am

(this news item posted on June.10.2006)

It came from out of nowhere.

I was getting used to --once again-- being a polyamorous guy with one girlfriend. An awesome and wonderful girlfriend, certainly, but folks generally become polyamorous to explore the possibility of more.

To be sure, exploring is pretty fun. I've met (and crushed on) all of these really wonderful women, all of whom have become friends and some of whome have become REALLY good friends. But none of whom really wanted to make that leap and look into a lasting romance. (clarification: no one local to me I mean.)

So all of a sudden I was at the housing co-op for dinner on Wednesday night like I generally am... and she just walked into my life. Oh I had met her before a bunch. We'd smiled at one another a lot and embraced like old friends a few times. But all of a sudden she was asking to share attention with me. She wanted to listen to my story and/or tell me her story.

Life is all about rushing and being busy for us young folks. We were only able to shcedule 15 minutes of giving one another our attention. It ended up being a half-hour and we acknowledged that we needed to do that again really soon.

Couple days later I was calling her. Hoping to schedule some attention time. Hoping for something soon. What she had in mind was even soon than what I had in mind. Namely, NOW. Let's get together and talk for an hour starting now.

We met up around nine. Talking was going really well. REALLY well. By the time midnight rolled around it was pretty clear that we were really interested in one another. Something really amazingly fun was happening. Energy was transforming and becoming really romantic energy.

By 3am I had a really intense case of the smittens. I tried to warn her about what she was getting into; to tell her every possible detractor and cosmic oddity. She didn't much care.

I had been waiting for something for a long time without really being sure what it was. I had been waiting for a woman to come along who I didn't have to talk into it. Someone actually enthusiastic about the idea of mingling lives with myself and Heather and excited about exploring a relationship with me. I had been thinking that maybe I was worth at least that.

The next day the three of us spent time getting to know each other.

Good times.

-Alex

Sound Bites

Sound Bites

(this news item posted on May.06.2006)

On-again-off-again = Off. Over. Done.

Performing = Done for a while. Last night I totally killt it!! FUN!

What's New = I might be hosting a radio show for Hip Hop in Action on WHLD am 1270 here in Western New York.

Writing = Nothing right now, but I'm starting to get the itch.

Love = SWEET LOOOOOVE.

Webwork = Finally making some progress.

WorkWork = Work is work.

Also not dead = AMProSoft

Also not dead = AMProSoft

(this news item posted on April.29.2006)

Picture Link

Wow. Hard to believe it had been about 7 years since the last time I drew a picture of Princess AMPra. It feels like there was a three year period there where I was drawing her every single day.

About a year ago I took a look at AMProSoft.com and was suddenly saddedned by the state of disrepair that I'd allowed it to fall into. AMProSoft.com was the very first domain name I ever registered. But, of course, it's much more than that. It represents more than 15 years of history, hopes and dreams as a video game maker, composer, comic book artist, publisher, etc.

So, a year ago I looked at the website which had not been updated in about 2 years. There wasn't much useful info there. First I just redesigned the whole thing so that it could at least look like the vision of a homepage that I had in my head. Then I slowly began adding in the pieces. My journal at first. That was a nice boost. Put my books up for sale. Recovered all of the old versions of the website and created some archives. Sort of a smithsonian exhibit of the website.

So I still have a ton more plans. Seems like it takes a minor miracle to ever come across the time to code some more stuff. But it's been happening. The Upcoming Events table on the main page that I coded this week is pretty nice. I've been digging through the old comics and considering putting out a few bound editions of the whole series. Maybe even finish the story arc I was on when it suddenly stopped. And I still work on that CD from time to time too.

I prefer to talk about projects once their finished rather than pronouncements about future plans, but sometimes putting it out there can inspire a body to find the time. Y'know.

Peace & Love,
-Alex

This Woman

This Woman

(this news item posted on April.21.2006)

Right. Okay. So, there's this woman right? Right. I won't mention her by name in my journal because I haven't really run that by her yet, but a lot of local folx already know who she is.

Wait. Hang on. Speaking of local folks --before I forget-- I just wrote a new program for my homepage that will let people know when and where I'm reading out and performing. Just click on http://www.amprosoft.com and you'll see it. Show up to any of that stuff and you'll see me.

Right. So about this woman. *sigh* She has this beaming easy smile and she laughs with abandon. A couple entries ago I wrote a bit about her. We were on-again-off-again for a bit. But we've been enjoying the on again for a good while now. I think about her lots, tons & bunches.

Life is good.

Last year I wrote an entry about how Buffalo's really cool because I make a ton of new friends all the time. Well, that's still true. But this woman makes a ton of friends too, and so now it seems like I have this whole huge influx of friends because I have access to her ton of friends and my ton of friends. I'm on friend overload.

And I'm sharing lots of friends with her too. I had an entry about my friend Christina and how she came to UU church and just became one of us on the spot. Well, this new woman in my life, came to UU church and just up and joined the choir. Yeah, that same choir that has done all kinds of things to my emotions over the years will now have her voice in it.

Saw my old friend Anna (from my poetry book) yesterday. I had really been missing her. She's gonna read at Urban Epiphany (see my website for the time & date & place). I saw my old friend Kim today. Missed her too. I start to think of all the friends I owe some time to. Nah, those're dangerous waters. Nevermind all that.

So, people keep telling me that I look good lately. That takes some getting used to. Maybe I'm just smiling more lately. It seems like everywhere I look there are people that I love. Work is going pretty good. My new girlfriend gets along well with my old girlfriend. Having Heather living back here in Buffalo with me really has it's wonderful moments. I feel like I'm finally starting to get this life thing right.

I have a couple new songs that I'm looking to perform soon, including one written just for Urban Epiphany on Sunday the 30th. That event comes highly recommended by me. And MAP open mic should be just as spectacular as it always is.

Peace & Love,
-Alex